On a journey to the Pre-Columbian archeological site of Tiwanaku in the Andes of western Bolivia, I got separated from my travel companions. The site closed for the day, trapping me inside.  A fence topped with razor-wire prevented my escape. I walked along the fence looking for a way out. As daylight began to fade, I found a break in the fence and squeezed through. Off in the distance, I spotted a dirt road. Left or right? I chose right.

Gate of the Moon Tiwanaku

A sudden thunderstorm soaked me to the bone. Shivering, I slogged through ankle-deep mud. Low ominous clouds made the blackest night fall fast. I was completely disoriented. Strangely, I felt no dread, no worry. Every cell in my body told me that nothing mattered—my family, my career, my life, not even my possible death. Everything felt irrelevant. That’s when real freedom struck me!  Janis popped in. “Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose.” In that moment, I had nothing to defend or protect.

Each July 4th we Americans celebrate our freedoms. Many of us think of them as being derived from wars bravely fought and evil “others” defeated. I honor all those who fight these external wars, including my dad, mom and one of my sisters.

To me, external wars are internal ones denied. I am engaging the internal war, the only war that ends all wars. Combat with ego can be brutal. Ego’s divisive voice is the real terrorist. It declares there is an “other.” It could be a fellow human, the Earth, or my Creator out to get me. Ego dies a thousand deaths. This is the only war won by surrender.

When I surrender to the oneness of my Soul, the illusion of “other” dissolves. Without “other” to judge or to judge me, there is no victim or perpetrator, no blame, shame or fault. The need for external conflict falls away, my mind’s creative capacities are free to serve my heart.

Inner freedom feels like all my senses are singing in harmony. My body feels luminous, at one with everything. I smile for no apparent reason.

Moment-by-moment mindfulness sustains this freedom. On my morning walk the other day, I caught myself judging an “other.” Immediately I felt imprisoned like I did at Tiwanaku. Escape required me to surrender again. A self-correcting measure emerged. I reframed my thoughts and language to acknowledge our oneness. The “other” dissolved. I was free again.

This 4th of July I celebrate the progress I’ve made in gaining the freedom to respond from my Soul’s Essence rather than   react from ego’s conditioning. It’s a freedom available to all who dare to surrender in order to bring forth the New Earth.

Gate of the Sun Tiwanaku

Walking through a beautiful botanical garden on a  sunny spring day recently, I spotted a man and woman, both silver haired, walking the path ahead of me. Their arms were wound around each other’s waists like teens in love. Love has no age limits, I thought. They turned around. I said, “You two give me hope!” My heart opened. I took a moment among spring’s blooms to drink from the well  of love within me. It is still deep, I found.

Two sons: talented young men now, for whom my love is absolute!                                

Creativity: I love expressing through architecture, art, writing, speaking, dreaming about humanity’s return to union. Losing all sense of myself, time, space or other when I’m immersed in these activities, I’m learning to emulate the all-loving Creator.

Companionship: the ways she views the world in contrast to my male point of view. My personal Jupiter, I love that she challenges me to expand. Inclusiveness feels so good!

Men: since we’ve aged out of competitiveness over sports, jobs, money and women, we can enjoy each other’s company again, like when we were young boys, eager to share our stories and our longings, loving life.

Women: having women friends who can set me straight, that’s another love of mine. 

Heaven and Earth: I love profound moments, intersections of communion. They feel like golden light running through my veins. Creator: thank you for making so much for me to love!

It’s impossible for me to prioritize my loves in a linear list. But in a circle I have infinite room for more. They are all parts of me. I could no more do without any of my loves     than I could do without breath.

Sages say our loves in the world are reflections of our self- love. If I love so much and so many, does that mean I have   an abundance of self-love? I’d like to believe that’s true,     but sometimes when I reach down deep into my well of         love, I find it bone dry.  In those moments I recall something a very wise teacher once said to me: when you find yourself feeling sad, remember that you have equal capacity to feel joy. I think I’m finally getting what she really meant. In this dualistic world, the trick is to gracefully surf the ebbs and flows between opposites. Accepting the shifts between opposites can be challenging, especially for an idealist with strong desires and high expectations for his life. Where did I pick up this expectation that I can live constantly high on love? And yet, there are times when my well of love is overflowing.

On my morning walk today, the sun shone brightly in a cloudless sky, the deepest blue. Trees rustled in a gentle breeze. I saw an eagle soaring. I thought of my sons, my creativity, my friends. What a blessing to love so much and so many! Then I remembered: where I place my focus in the moment makes all the difference.

Until I woke up in the hospital with both my hands in bandages, I never questioned my imperfection. Before that day I was a happy, innocent child.  Yes, I had noticed that my hands were different from those of other children and the adults around me, but I thought nothing of it. Everyone had something different about them. So what? My hands seemed normal to me. The bubble of innocence around me burst that day in the hospital. That was the day it first occurred to me that others felt the need to fix me. Was there something “wrong” with me?

At a tender age an “attitude“ took command of my personality. To prove my value, I became defiant. I’ll show you what I can do with my hands! I built hundreds of model cars, planes and ships. When I couldn’t hold small pieces of plastic to glue them together, I raided my mom’s sewing basket and found a pair of tweezers. I taped them in the web between my half-thumb and deformed index finger on my left hand. With this homemade prosthetic, I triumphed, now able to hold the smallest pieces. But “attitude” demanded further proof of my normalcy. I played football, basketball and baseball at positions challenging for my hands. I succeeded. I chose architecture as my profession. It required me to draft, draw freehand and make models. I took great delight in proving others wrong about me. “Attitude” required diligent perseverance in the face of all odds.

In my forties, I found myself in crisis. “Attitude” no longer worked to accomplish my goals. I had to find a new way. When I’m faced with serious challenges I go to the mirror, where I pose questions to the eyes staring back at me. I trust that my Soul has the answers I seek. My Soul explained: Your hands are a daily reminder to show compassion for the myriad ways in which The One expresses and explores the multiplicity of Its perfection in human form. As individual aspects of The One, all people are perfect as they are. Once you understand this, there is no more need for “attitude.”  Now prove your perfection only to yourself.

Changing my mind about myself has been an ongoing process. I’ve had to alter my judgmental beliefs about myself and the world. I’ve also had to change my inner dialogue about our physical differences. I’m learning that everyone is perfect in the eyes of the Soul.

Parents! Please consider the gifts that your children are as they were born, before you decide they need to be changed. What do their special conditions contribute to your family constellation and your perceptions of wholeness and perfection?  Doctors! Please, before you operate on a child with birth “defects,” consider that you may be attempting to fix something that is already perfect in the heart of The One.

The officer refused to consider my circumstances. “You must follow the rules!” To do so, I’d need to rent a car. Ours was wrecked now. I’d have to take a day off from my new job! At twenty-five, I was ready to fight for fairness – justice. All my attempts failed. Exasperated, I erupted, shouting obscenities. Charged with Aggravated Harassment, I was thrown in jail. This is justice? In court, after hearing my story, the judge dismissed the charge. But ego kept retelling this story for years, remaining defiant, ranting against authority. Ego proclaimed my victimhood and viscously berated that officer. Revenge! It screamed. Down with the system! When others cried justice! I empathized.

Many years later, I discovered the source of my rage toward male authority figures. Important men in my early life had projected their own limiting beliefs onto me. They defined me, as a dreamer, claiming I was incapable of achieving my ambitions. “Get real!” They demanded. Part of me acquiesced, adopting their projections as my own “truth.” Another part of me continued rebelling. “I’ll show you bastards what I can do!” A brutal war waged between opposing parts of me in the space between my ears. I’m good. I’m bad. I’m smart. I’m dumb. I’m this. I’m that. Then, one day staring into a mirror, I screamed! Will this war ever end? An inner voice responded: “When you honor your true self!” What? “When you live to express your Soul’s Essence, your tenderness and compassion will end this war.” I don’t understand! “Stop believing those self-critical thoughts and you will be at peace!”

I heard that and set about observing my thoughts. I practiced releasing ego’s claims of my limitations. The opinions of others about me mattered less and less. Realizing that I had a choice which thoughts to trust, I began voicing the thoughts that honored my Essence. To my delight, I learned that positive inner dialogue spoken aloud alters my outer reality in a positive way.

Returning to the mirror one day, standing eyeball to eyeball, I claimed self-authority: I am tenderness and compassion. I felt balanced and peaceful. I felt a sense of fairness and justice toward myself. Now I had peacekeeping tools should inner war break out again. 

As I express my Essence, justice is mirrored in my outer world. Having changed my thoughts, I changed my world. My world now seems a kinder place. I even smile again, sometimes for no apparent reason.

I wonder: Was there ever a time when ego didn’t dominate human behavior? Could Essence have been the original way of being human? If so, could we all return to that state of being? What would it be like to co-create from our combined Essences? What would Earth be like then? Perhaps justice might be everyone’s reality!                  

albertcmoore@gmail.com

I once craved the exhilarating highs I got from escaping into my creative projects. One time, I was completely absorbed in an architectural design project for thirty-two hours. When I finally rose from the chair, my legs buckled. I had to hold onto the desk until I regained the strength to walk. I was addicted to creating. I believed the purpose of my life was to sustain these highs. When projects were completed, I felt empty and real downers followed. Swings between highs and lows tormented me. Eventually I burned out. I slid into a deep dark void. Drained and depressed, I had little energy for basic functioning, much less for friends, family or the fix of creativity I craved. During one trip to the void, my inner voice informed me that I feared taking the middle road of moderation. I judged it, thinking it meant I had to accept a pulseless life, flatlined on mediocrity. 

A sudden flash of insight urged me back to nature, to seek her counsel and wisdom. I recalled that she carries the natural rhythmic cycles of birth, life, death and rebirth. So I hiked to my favorite spot for contemplation, a small clearing in the forest along the banks of a stream. Desperate for creative rebirth, I begged Mother Nature to refresh my memory of her ways. Sitting by that flowing stream, I felt her natural Order dissolving my judgments. I became more receptive. The stream revealed to me the creative power of its fluidity. I realized I had been out of sync with nature’s principles. That left me vulnerable to ego’s assertion that the high I sought required external gratification such as approval from others for my creative works.

I returned to nature regularly for more insights. Eventually, I remembered that, like nature, I have an inner core, an unshakable foundation of light within me. One time while enraptured by the cloudless blue sky against the evergreen mountains and terra-cotta cliffs of New Mexico, I experienced the profound presence of my own core. In that moment I became the meeting place of heaven and earth. My body tingled. My mind expanded and my heart opened. Tears of joy! Rebirth! Balance.

Now, balance fills my cells with self-acceptance and love. It’s as if the forces of heaven and earth have reached equilibrium. The powers inherent in each have united. I’m enthusiastic about projects I undertake and complete them to my personal standards of excellence. I even look forward to downtimes after my immersions into creativity. When I’m in balance, my life is fluid and easy. Balance releases me from my need for approval from others. My body feels more flexible, my emotions more stable and my mind is more open to intuitive insights. My blood pressure normalizes. And I even have plenty of energy to explore quality experiences with others.        

May we meet on a hike by a stream one day, touch the core of our being and in balance share grateful hearts!

albertcmoore@gmail.com

To some people, discipline is a dirty word because it smacks of rigidly following rules. To me discipline is essential to living creatively. Discipline provides a cocoon-like structure in which I feel safe and confident living in the world. Therefore, I’m free to express myself, explore new ideas and new relationships. Discipline helps me integrate body, mind and spirit so I stay both grounded and open to inner guidance and inspiration from the Blue Space.

Monday through Friday my physical discipline begins with yoga to keep my body flexible and my heart open and concludes with a 30-minute vigorous walk. Every day includes a healthy breakfast. Three evenings per week, I work out at the gym. With these routines I stay alert and present in my body, home of my enduring spirit. I acknowledge the higher power within me and meditate daily. I practice positive inner dialogue which translates into positive outer language so I communicate with other people from my spirit. These disciplines help me work effectively and efficiently in the world. They also leave me plenty of time for leisure and play. Expressing gratitude for my life is my last daily discipline. I find it relaxes me so I sleep well.

When I’m asked how my dedication to discipline began, I tell inquirers that as a youngster I made many model planes, boats and cars. During my model-making, an inner voice reminded me of the importance of completing these projects. Following this voice, I cultivated self-discipline to ensure their completion. I’ve been rewarded with self-satisfaction for jobs well done and the self-confidence to embrace change and explore new things. As a result, I’m actively participating in creating my life.

To prevent boredom or regimentation, I vary the sequence, rhythm and intensity of my practices from day to day. I practice being alert to my thoughts and feelings. This adds a playful factor, especially when my mind says: you can slack off today. One day per week I allow myself an indulgence day to eat whatever I fancy. Hum, sweets, pizza, maybe! Weekends I break from my physical routines. These flexibilities help me expand and refine my skills as an architect, artist, writer and speaker. My relationships also improve because I’m flexible and cooperative and I’m learning to listen well.

Mental discipline is portable. I can take it with me anywhere. No luggage, it only requires space in my consciousness. And it’s always available, no internet connection or electricity required. Plane and train travel are great places to practice mental discipline.

From discipline I gain dominion (self-authority) over the ego’s assertion that I’m separate from others, from the Earth and from Creator. Frequently expressing gratitude for my life connects me with the Core of my being, dwelling place of my higher self, with its always kind and supportive voice. It helps me harness the positive forces needed for creative life-making. Through my practice of these disciplines, I‘m learning to cooperate with these forces.

albertcmoore@gmail.com

I admit – patience is not my strong suit. I can behave impatiently when something I really desire isn’t materializing as I’d planned. I’ve learned that impatience results from mistrusting my ability to attract my desires. With mistrust comes doubt and worry, which limits the potential of my thoughts, feelings and actions to attract what I desire. Mistrust also demands that I manipulate worldly events, objects or people to willfully force the acquisition of my desires. Mistrust may also insist that an intermediary is required to do my bidding. Mistrust disempowers me. It separates me from my desires.

Feeling the discomfort and agitation common to mistrust, I prepare to enter my mental workshop where I make necessary internal shifts. For motivation, I read this poem by Rumi, the 13th century Sufi Mystic. Reading it heightens my confidence, but in a humble and grateful way.

     When I run after what I think I want,   

     my days are a furnace of stress and anxiety.

     If I sit in my own place of patience,

    what I need flows to me, and without pain.

     From this I understand that what I want also wants me,

     is looking for me and is attracting me.

     There is a great secret here for anyone who can grasp it.

As the vibration of this eloquent message spreads through me, my worried mind relaxes. My heart becomes empowered with patience enveloping me like a warm blanket on a cold night. Comforted, I regain trust in my capacity to apply the Laws governing the universe. For clarity I write detailed descriptions of my desires. Reading them aloud, I infuse my desires with joy as I feel them fulfilled in the present moment. This process is similar to tuning a radio but here I’m tuning my thoughts and feelings to the frequencies of my desires. This fulfills Laws’ promise of their manifestation. Finally, I let go. I’m now prepared to receive my desires.

Does this indicate that I’m full of self-righteous entitlement? Not at all! A part of me remembers that we all have an innate capacity to attract the materials we require for physical sustenance and the experiences that fulfill our Souls’ longing. While this idea may appear presumptuous, egotistical or idealistic, I have come to know that all humans, as images and likenesses of our mutual Creator, share a deep yearning to emulate Creator. Patience and practice are key. So, I’m learning that patience is not only a virtue, it’s also a daily strategy. A practice of patience unifies me with my desires.

In unity consciousness everyone has equal access to the ethers where every imaginable desire already exists and everything belongs to everybody. An open mind, a grateful heart and a vivid imagination, provides access to these ethers where all desires abide awaiting our enthusiastic union with them. Patient, I trust that the universe is aligning a multitude of circumstances to bring my desires into physical reality.

Illusion takes on many forms in this dualistic world.  At the root of all these forms is the thought that I am separate from others, the natural world, and from the Origin of all things. Feeling separate, I tend to judge myself or others as less than me or more than me. I might  also judgmentally compare religions, politics, social status, appearances or possessions.    

The illusion of my separateness took root at birth. My fingers on both hands were “deformed.” Growing up “different” presented challenges. I was in my early forties, in the throes of life altering-events when I first questioned my reflection in the mirror through tear-filled eyes. Why was I born abnormal? I heard an inner voice respond: That which you call your “abnormality” is actually your Soul’s link with compassion for all life. The voice continued: People enter physical life with some sense of separateness, manifesting either outwardly or inwardly. You wear yours outwardly for all to see. The voice ended by suggesting: Take stock of how your life has unfolded as a result of your link with compassion. How has your “difference,” in your perception, both separated you from and connected you with others?

I followed the voice’s suggestion. I discovered that my feeling of separateness had permeated every aspect of my personal and professional life. It motivated all my pursuits. Like a pit-bull I competed to prove my value to others, but actually to myself. I was very defensive and guarded. Behaving separate alienated me from others. In contrast (and perhaps because of my abnormality) I also recognized that I am capable of deep empathy, compassion and tenderness. I root for all underdogs. These contrasting qualities puzzled me.

I came to realize that these contrasts revealed that which I am not (separate) as well as that which I AM (one with all things through my Essence, tenderness). I can comfortably embrace living in a state of contrast knowing now that I have choices about which of these qualities to employ in creating my reality. I am gaining wisdom. I wondered more: If I’ve created my life and all I have from my sense of separateness, then what am I capable of creating for myself and the world from my Essence, my tenderness, and my expanding sense of union with all things?

Taking time out from the daly motion of life for introspection allows me to embrace life’s contrasts and paradoxes without the need to take sides. This helps me maintain inner balance and neutrality. Sustaining neutrality, I am free from the conditioned judgmental behavior of separation consciousness; free to consciously connect with my Soul. I’ve come to see my ventures into the illusion of my separateness as my Soul’s way of providing valuable lessons in humility, patience and kindness – tools I require to fulfill the destiny my Soul has designed for me. By bursting the illusion of my separateness, the Essence of my Soul is free to express fully and join with others in birthing the New Earth where our Union guides all human endeavors.                                                                          

For several minutes he’d stood rigidly, directly in front of me, attempting to intimidate me with his clinched fists and scowl. Adamantly, he refused to pay my invoice, even though I had delivered the promised architectural drawings illustrating precisely the design he’d requested, on the day and for the fee we’d agreed upon two weeks prior. I remained relaxed. A tingling sensation enveloped my body. It coalesced in my chest where the two sides of my rib cage join. I felt it flow out of me and go in his direction. Immediately and without hesitation or another word he walked over to his desk, wrote a check for the full amount of my invoice, then handed it to me. I thanked him politely, left, then sat in my car amazed at what had just happened.      

A similar phenomenon occurred when refinancing my mortgage. I was aghast at the closing when the agent informed me of her large fee due at signing. I had been led to believe from my mortgage broker that I’d be receiving money.  Feeling my shock, the agent suggested we take a one-hour recess from the closing. I left to recenter myself by tapping into that internal tingling sensation I’d felt in similar challenging situations. When I returned to the closing, the agent informed me that a solution had been reached. With my signature, no funds needed to be exchanged by either party and my refinancing would be complete.  I walked away very grateful.   

These are just two examples of magical unforeseen outcomes among many I’ve experienced when I immerse myself in the vibration of Order. Often, when I mention Order, people tend to react, thinking I’m imposing authority over another or a devious sequencing scheme intended to manipulate events in my favor. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, being in this vibration involves the total honoring of the present circumstances, all concerned and a complete surrender of my ego’s expectations. Being in the vibration of Order occurs by being empty of judgements, expectations and any preconceived outcomes.

  If you’ve spent any time in nature, in the forest, the mountains, or at large bodies of water, you’ve probably experienced this inherent vibration. It’s a calm,  judgment-free emptiness where everything is considered sacred, no matter how it appears. Order frees us from the dictates and demands of our ego’s conditioned reactions. We feel balanced, allowing the fluids of Creation itself to flow through us freely to provide solutions that benefit all. With practice, anyone can summon and immerse themselves in Order. It is native to the open human heart. Order is a prerequisite to the peace we seek. And when practiced in groups, Order establishes a wave, or medium, through which unity consciousness flows to organically dissolve our dichotomies, dualities and illusions of separateness. The original peaceful way of being human emerges, opening unforeseen pathways to manifest the New Earth.