I admit – patience is not my strong suit. I can behave impatiently when something I really desire isn’t materializing as I’d planned. I’ve learned that impatience results from mistrusting my ability to attract my desires. With mistrust comes doubt and worry, which limits the potential of my thoughts, feelings and actions to attract what I desire. Mistrust also demands that I manipulate worldly events, objects or people to willfully force the acquisition of my desires. Mistrust may also insist that an intermediary is required to do my bidding. Mistrust disempowers me. It separates me from my desires.

Feeling the discomfort and agitation common to mistrust, I prepare to enter my mental workshop where I make necessary internal shifts. For motivation, I read this poem by Rumi, the 13th century Sufi Mystic. Reading it heightens my confidence, but in a humble and grateful way.

     When I run after what I think I want,   

     my days are a furnace of stress and anxiety.

     If I sit in my own place of patience,

    what I need flows to me, and without pain.

     From this I understand that what I want also wants me,

     is looking for me and is attracting me.

     There is a great secret here for anyone who can grasp it.

As the vibration of this eloquent message spreads through me, my worried mind relaxes. My heart becomes empowered with patience enveloping me like a warm blanket on a cold night. Comforted, I regain trust in my capacity to apply the Laws governing the universe. For clarity I write detailed descriptions of my desires. Reading them aloud, I infuse my desires with joy as I feel them fulfilled in the present moment. This process is similar to tuning a radio but here I’m tuning my thoughts and feelings to the frequencies of my desires. This fulfills Laws’ promise of their manifestation. Finally, I let go. I’m now prepared to receive my desires.

Does this indicate that I’m full of self-righteous entitlement? Not at all! A part of me remembers that we all have an innate capacity to attract the materials we require for physical sustenance and the experiences that fulfill our Souls’ longing. While this idea may appear presumptuous, egotistical or idealistic, I have come to know that all humans, as images and likenesses of our mutual Creator, share a deep yearning to emulate Creator. Patience and practice are key. So, I’m learning that patience is not only a virtue, it’s also a daily strategy. A practice of patience unifies me with my desires.

In unity consciousness everyone has equal access to the ethers where every imaginable desire already exists and everything belongs to everybody. An open mind, a grateful heart and a vivid imagination, provides access to these ethers where all desires abide awaiting our enthusiastic union with them. Patient, I trust that the universe is aligning a multitude of circumstances to bring my desires into physical reality.

Illusion takes on many forms in this dualistic world.  At the root of all these forms is the thought that I am separate from others, the natural world, and from the Origin of all things. Feeling separate, I tend to judge myself or others as less than me or more than me. I might  also judgmentally compare religions, politics, social status, appearances or possessions.    

The illusion of my separateness took root at birth. My fingers on both hands were “deformed.” Growing up “different” presented challenges. I was in my early forties, in the throes of life altering-events when I first questioned my reflection in the mirror through tear-filled eyes. Why was I born abnormal? I heard an inner voice respond: That which you call your “abnormality” is actually your Soul’s link with compassion for all life. The voice continued: People enter physical life with some sense of separateness, manifesting either outwardly or inwardly. You wear yours outwardly for all to see. The voice ended by suggesting: Take stock of how your life has unfolded as a result of your link with compassion. How has your “difference,” in your perception, both separated you from and connected you with others?

I followed the voice’s suggestion. I discovered that my feeling of separateness had permeated every aspect of my personal and professional life. It motivated all my pursuits. Like a pit-bull I competed to prove my value to others, but actually to myself. I was very defensive and guarded. Behaving separate alienated me from others. In contrast (and perhaps because of my abnormality) I also recognized that I am capable of deep empathy, compassion and tenderness. I root for all underdogs. These contrasting qualities puzzled me.

I came to realize that these contrasts revealed that which I am not (separate) as well as that which I AM (one with all things through my Essence, tenderness). I can comfortably embrace living in a state of contrast knowing now that I have choices about which of these qualities to employ in creating my reality. I am gaining wisdom. I wondered more: If I’ve created my life and all I have from my sense of separateness, then what am I capable of creating for myself and the world from my Essence, my tenderness, and my expanding sense of union with all things?

Taking time out from the daly motion of life for introspection allows me to embrace life’s contrasts and paradoxes without the need to take sides. This helps me maintain inner balance and neutrality. Sustaining neutrality, I am free from the conditioned judgmental behavior of separation consciousness; free to consciously connect with my Soul. I’ve come to see my ventures into the illusion of my separateness as my Soul’s way of providing valuable lessons in humility, patience and kindness – tools I require to fulfill the destiny my Soul has designed for me. By bursting the illusion of my separateness, the Essence of my Soul is free to express fully and join with others in birthing the New Earth where our Union guides all human endeavors.