I once craved the exhilarating highs I got from escaping into my creative projects. One time, I was completely absorbed in an architectural design project for thirty-two hours. When I finally rose from the chair, my legs buckled. I had to hold onto the desk until I regained the strength to walk. I was addicted to creating. I believed the purpose of my life was to sustain these highs. When projects were completed, I felt empty and real downers followed. Swings between highs and lows tormented me. Eventually I burned out. I slid into a deep dark void. Drained and depressed, I had little energy for basic functioning, much less for friends, family or the fix of creativity I craved. During one trip to the void, my inner voice informed me that I feared taking the middle road of moderation. I judged it, thinking it meant I had to accept a pulseless life, flatlined on mediocrity.
A sudden flash of insight urged me back to nature, to seek her counsel and wisdom. I recalled that she carries the natural rhythmic cycles of birth, life, death and rebirth. So I hiked to my favorite spot for contemplation, a small clearing in the forest along the banks of a stream. Desperate for creative rebirth, I begged Mother Nature to refresh my memory of her ways. Sitting by that flowing stream, I felt her natural Order dissolving my judgments. I became more receptive. The stream revealed to me the creative power of its fluidity. I realized I had been out of sync with nature’s principles. That left me vulnerable to ego’s assertion that the high I sought required external gratification such as approval from others for my creative works.
I returned to nature regularly for more insights. Eventually, I remembered that, like nature, I have an inner core, an unshakable foundation of light within me. One time while enraptured by the cloudless blue sky against the evergreen mountains and terra-cotta cliffs of New Mexico, I experienced the profound presence of my own core. In that moment I became the meeting place of heaven and earth. My body tingled. My mind expanded and my heart opened. Tears of joy! Rebirth! Balance.
Now, balance fills my cells with self-acceptance and love. It’s as if the forces of heaven and earth have reached equilibrium. The powers inherent in each have united. I’m enthusiastic about projects I undertake and complete them to my personal standards of excellence. I even look forward to downtimes after my immersions into creativity. When I’m in balance, my life is fluid and easy. Balance releases me from my need for approval from others. My body feels more flexible, my emotions more stable and my mind is more open to intuitive insights. My blood pressure normalizes. And I even have plenty of energy to explore quality experiences with others.
May we meet on a hike by a stream one day, touch the core of our being and in balance share grateful hearts!